The Story Behind I Surrender — Job Loss. Faith. Surrender.

Have you ever felt completely broken?

Like everything was falling apart at once?

I have.

And this is the story behind my new single I Surrender — out this Friday August 7th.

Who I Am

My name is Rich Pangilinan — known professionally as DJ Riddler.

35 years in the music industry. Billboard Top 10 artist. Former radio personality at Z100 and KTU New York. SiriusXM BPM host. Former executive at Tommy Boy, Capitol, MCA, and Ultra Records.

I started DJing at 17 years old for $50 a night at a teen club in Houston.

And in 2017 — everything changed.

The Setbacks

In 2017 I lost my radio programming job to a format change.

I went back to DJing full time. Something I had always done on the side alongside my radio career — but now it was my primary income. My livelihood. The thing standing between my family and financial uncertainty.

Then Covid hit in 2020.

And I lost most of my DJ gigs overnight.

No venues. No shows. No crowds. No income.

I was starting over at 50 years old. Worrying about how to support my family. Wondering if my best days were behind me.

Then my mother Priscilla passed away.

And shortly after — my doctor told me I was type 2 diabetic with high blood pressure.

He put me on medication.

The same medications. The same dosages. As my mom.

I sat with that for a long time.

That was my wake up call.

The Surrender

That was when I fully surrendered to God.

Not just in words. Not just on Sundays. In everything.

Daily prayer. Sunday mass every week without exception. Trusting Him with the things I couldn't control — which at that point was almost everything.

And through that foundation — I found the discipline to do the hard work.

I changed my diet. I started exercising consistently. I took care of my body the way I hadn't been.

I lost 45 pounds.

Today I am off one of my medications. My health is improving. I have a job I love at Warehouse Live Midtown Houston. My family is well.

I want to be clear about something — faith alone didn't heal me. Diet, exercise, medication, and stress reduction all played a role.

But faith gave me the foundation to do all of those things consistently. When I stopped trying to control everything and surrendered — I found the discipline I had been missing.

That's what surrender actually looks like in real life. It's not passive. It's not giving up.

It's the most active thing I've ever done.

The Song

During Covid — in the middle of all of that — I started writing music.

Not for a club. Not for radio. For myself.

One of those songs took five years to finish.

I eventually brought the track to my production partner Ethan Capps who elevated it into something bigger than what I originally imagined.

Then I found the right voice.

Her name is Madalina Cretu. She's from Romania. We have never been in the same room together. Everything happened through email and audio files sent across the Atlantic.

From the first listen I knew she was the right one.

The song is called I Surrender.

Barcelona

This past June I took my son Renner to Barcelona for a golf tournament.

While we were there I visited Montserrat — the sacred mountain monastery in Catalonia where St. Ignatius of Loyola surrendered his sword to God in the 1500s.

I lit a candle there on my mother's birthday.

And I felt her presence in that place.

That same day — Pope Leo drove by twice.

I stood there thinking about my song. Already written. Already finished. Called I Surrender.

And it felt like it was all supposed to happen exactly this way.

St. Ignatius surrendered his sword and his pride and his ambition to God at Montserrat in the 1500s.

I surrendered my career, my health, my grief, and my need for control to God during Covid.

The connection felt undeniable.

Why I'm Sharing This

I'm sharing this story because I know I'm not the only one who has felt broken.

Job loss. Health struggles. Grief. Financial pressure. Starting over when you thought you were done starting over.

If you're carrying something heavy right now — I want you to know that surrender isn't weakness.

It's not giving up.

It's choosing to trust something bigger than yourself with the things you can't control.

That choice changed my life.

I Surrender is my way of honoring God for every setback He turned into a setup. For every moment I thought I was done — and He wasn't finished with me yet.

The Song is Out This Friday

I Surrender — Riddler, Madalina Cretu — releases on all streaming platforms this Friday August 7th.

Pre-save it now so it automatically appears in your library the moment it drops.

Pre-save link: paradise.ffm.to/ptl008

And if you're in Houston — come see me open for Morgan Page at Warehouse Live Midtown that same night. A classics set from 2005 to 2010. The music that built my career. On the same night my most personal song releases.

Some things come full circle. 🙏🏽